One of the great early Muslims, Hamdun al-Qassar, said, “If a friend among your friends errs, make seventy excuses for them. If your hearts are unable to do this, then know that the shortcoming is in your own selves.”
I use this one a lot.
I love working in the community where the efforts of a group of people combine to create something greater than the sum of its parts. But, as in any enterprise involving people, mistakes will be made. The ball will be dropped (sometimes by me, which is another reason why I use it a lot). And often, things will not go exactly as planned.
When this happens, rather than attribute the error to malice, carelessness and disrespect, we make excuses for our friend. We don't even need to make seventy. I find once I get to two or three, I start feeling better already.
I've always thought of this tradition as a good way of maintaining social relations. And it is. It keeps us from planting seeds of ill will against each other. But besides that, it also helps us maintain a good emotional state within ourselves. For as much as the way we see the world might affect how we treat other people, it really affects ourselves the most.
I use this one a lot.
I love working in the community where the efforts of a group of people combine to create something greater than the sum of its parts. But, as in any enterprise involving people, mistakes will be made. The ball will be dropped (sometimes by me, which is another reason why I use it a lot). And often, things will not go exactly as planned.
When this happens, rather than attribute the error to malice, carelessness and disrespect, we make excuses for our friend. We don't even need to make seventy. I find once I get to two or three, I start feeling better already.
I've always thought of this tradition as a good way of maintaining social relations. And it is. It keeps us from planting seeds of ill will against each other. But besides that, it also helps us maintain a good emotional state within ourselves. For as much as the way we see the world might affect how we treat other people, it really affects ourselves the most.
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