An attitude of generosity

One of the things I've learned from living with over 20 different roommates in the past eight years, is that it helps to have an attitude of generosity.

Generosity encompasses much more than giving money.  We can be generous in our thoughts by thinking well of people and giving them excuses when things go wrong.  We can be generous in our words by thanking people, complimenting them and praising their good work.  We can be generous in our time by listening, spending time with people and paying attention to them.  We can be generous in our actions by doing things that we think others would appreciate.  It could be washing dishes or taking out the garbage or choosing to buy the type of juice or cereal they like or adjusting the driver's seat of the car after we're done with it so that they don't have to adjust it themselves when they use it next.  The possibilities for being generous are endless -- and most of them, especially the most meaningful ones, have nothing to do with money.

Having an attitude of generosity goes a long way towards living happily with people.  The key is, in our generosity we mustn't come with an expectation of reciprocation from others.  Some people may be generous in return and some may not.  We may also find our generosity rewarded in ways that we could never have foreseen.  But even if we don't see such rewards, internally we feel the reward of our generosity through a goodness growing in our hearts.  And ultimately, we pray that the final rewards of our generosity come from The Most Generous.

Even a smile is charity

Our Girl Guide and Brownie unit was selling cookies today in front of the Metro at Liberty Village.  We had our cartons of cookies stacked in a little display near the store's entrance.  The girls were carrying a box in each hand (later reduced to only one box carried with both hands because too many boxes were getting dropped), eager to display their wares and sell them to interested customers.  Each time anyone came approached the door, the girls would ask, in the sweetest way they could, and often in unison, "Would you like to buy some Girl Guide cookies?"

Lots of people did.  In fact, we completely ran out of cookies about 10 minutes before the girls were getting picked up by their parents.  It was great.

But of course, not everyone bought cookies.  Lots of people walked right past us.  Some were busy talking on their phones.  Some completely ignored us.

And some would say "No, thank you." or "Sorry, I've already bought a bunch of cookies from my (friend/niece/grand daughter/etc.)" or "No, thanks, but good luck on the campaign!" and they would smile.

We appreciated that.

It also made a difference.

Feeding hungry hearts

When we started Project Downtown, we learned that it's not just about feeding hungry stomachs, but also hungry hearts.  So, when we go out and deliver our food packages, we try to stop and talk to the people we meet, ask them how they're doing and listen to them.  It's our small attempt to alleviate hunger in the heart as well as the stomach.

Today, I was reminded again of how the benefits of giving don't fall solely upon the recipient.

As we were walking back to the car after delivering our packages, we passed a group of the guys opening their packages and eating the sandwiches we made.  They smiled and thanked us and wished us a good evening and a good weekend.  We wished them the same.  My heart swelled.

After Project Downtown, a few of us had dinner together and spent the rest of the evening chatting and hanging out.  I love to spend an evening spent chatting and hanging out with friends.  It just fills me up.  And because we do Project Downtown every week, we get to hang out every week as well.  And I realized that Project Downtown also feeds my own hungry heart.

Three hearts

Every Friday afternoon, my friends and I do Project Downtown.  We put together packages of food and snacks - lately it's been a hot dog or hamburger, a granola bar or two, a cheese bun and/or a muffin, an orange, a banana and juice - and distribute them to people hanging around City Hall who look like they would appreciate the food. 

We learned about Project Downtown four years ago, when a student from the US came to Toronto and introduced it to us.  One of the things he told us has really stuck with me.

Recently, I realized that it's something that applies to any good work or act of kindness done to benefit another person.

He said that when we go out and do Project Downtown, our actions touch three hearts.  One, we touch the heart of the recipient.  Two, we touch the heart of the person who sees us do what we do.  And three, we touch our own hearts.

How are you? Really?

How often do you say 'How are you?' out of habit?  How many times has someone asked you the question without waiting for the answer?  How do you answer when you're not actually fine or good or great or okay?

Can we ask the question differently?  Should we ask How are you feeling? How are you, really? How are you on a scale of one to ten?

It's an important question.  We need to ask it.  We need to answer it.  We need to hear the answer.  We need to have our answer heard.