Be a gift

At the Reviving the Islamic Spirit Knowledge Retreat this year, a sister from Quebec asked Dr. Tariq Ramadan what Muslims should do when they live in a community that is increasingly hostile to them and the practice of their religion.

She's joined others in opposition to Quebec's proposed values charter.  Meanwhile, her friends who wear the hijab have difficulty finding jobs and are faced with increasing animosity and abuse on the streets.

She asked, at what point do you just leave?

His response...

When they try to portray you as a threat, be a gift.
Stay.  And be a gift.

Service for the Soul

It's a truth I've known for a long time.  That the giver is the greatest beneficiary of the gift.  That volunteering and helping people out really helps us more than anyone else. 

These past few months, being away from my little community, I've come to see that truth with a new clarity.

I need to work.  I need to serve.  To be useful.  To push a wheelchair down the street and have coffee with my neighbour.  I need to pack meals and give them to the guys in the square that wait for us every Friday.  I need to shop for groceries and cook and serve and share a meal with the volunteers and guests who join us for our monthly lunch. 

The service isn't for them.  It's for me.  I need it.  Like my lungs need air and my stomach needs food.  My soul needs service.

Helping classmates

I've been in Indonesia for a few weeks now, visiting family.  One of the things I've noticed here is the strength of social networks.  Like my dad's cohort from university (they're going to have their 40th reunion this year) -- I see how they take care of each other.

One of their classmates has suffered from schizophrenia for years, and they've taken it upon themselves to take care of him.  They collect money and send it to him every week.  My dad gives him assignments to keep him busy.  He let him live in his office for some time (my dad's the dean at a university here, so his office is fairly spacious).  When this classmate went away to Thailand, upon his return, my dad's other classmates asked my dad if he could keep his passport to prevent him from wandering around the world when he's not well.  He willingly gave it to my dad and then my dad gave it back to him after some time.

Another classmate suffered from Parkinsons, so the class collected money to put his children through university.

Often, when someone has a problem, we look for a program or agency to take care of them.

What if we just did it ourselves?

Changing the condition of a people

On how small actions can have a huge impact...

We recite to you from the news of Moses and Pharaoh in truth for a people who believe.  Indeed, Pharaoh exalted himself in the land and made its people into factions, oppressing a sector among them, slaughtering their [newborn] sons and keeping their females alive. Indeed, he was of the corrupters. (Qur'an 28:3-4)

This is the story of a people who were subjected to the oppression of one of the worst oppressors who had ever lived.  Fir'aun divided the Bani Israil, he suppressed a group of them, slaughtered their sons and enslaved their women.  It's hard to imagine a more oppressed community than the
Bani Israil at this time.

And We wanted to confer favor upon those who were oppressed in the land and make them leaders and make them inheritors.  And establish them in the land and show Pharaoh and [his minister] Haman and their soldiers through them that which they had feared. (Qur'an 28:5-6)

But Allah wanted to change the situation.  He wanted to grant them bounty and power on Earth and make them leaders of humanity.

Given their conditions under Fir'aun's rule, what sort of change would be required to take this community from being the most oppressed people to to being leaders of humanity?  It must be something extraordinary.  So what did Allah do next?

And We inspired to the mother of Moses, "Suckle him; but when you fear for him, cast him into the river and do not fear and do not grieve. Indeed, We will return him to you and will make him [one] of the messengers."  (Qur'an 28:7)

The first step that Allah takes to to reveal to Musa 'alaihi salaam's mother to nurse him and throw him in the river if she is afraid for him -- such a seemingly insignificant step in relation to the huge task ahead...

We should never belittle our roles in the process of change.  The entire process may take a long time -- generations in the case of the Bani Israil.  Allah's promise to them was not fulfilled until the time of Sulaiman 'alaihi salam.  But indeed Allah's promise was fulfilled.

Our position now is not worse than the position of the Bani Israil.  And as we have seen Him change their condition, we have confidence that He will change ours.  How and when and by who is up to Him, not up to us.  Our job is to submit to Him and do our jobs in whatever position He has placed us in.  And just as we learn from the example of the mother of Musa 'alaihi salaam, we should never belittle our role in the process of change.

Plenitude by Juliet Schor

This is the text of the speech I wrote and delivered for Toastmaster's this week. 

I’ve been doing quite a bit of reading and thinking recently. Having spent most of the past 12 years in university, that really shouldn’t be anything new, but once I finished school and wrapped up my work contracts, I got to do a different kind of thinking and reading. My reading was no longer limited to quantum dots, viruses and nanotechnology. I started thinking about bigger things – literally and figuratively.

Two of the issues that interest me most are unemployment and environmental sustainability. How do we build a society where everyone can make a living? And how do we do that while preserving the environment we depend on to live?

We live in one of the most prosperous societies that have ever existed. At a mundane level, just look at our grocery stores and the abundance and variety of food on the shelves. I remember going to my local Loblaws a few years ago and counting 18 different kinds of apples available for sale. 18! Our grocery stores are brimming with foods from every corner of the world. And yet, so many people in this society struggle to put food on the table for their families because they are unemployed or underemployed.

In first year economics, we learned that to decrease unemployment, we have to increase growth. We need to pump more money into the economy so that people will spend more and buy more. This increased demand will lead to increased production and the creation of new jobs.

But this solution comes with its own problems. In a world with finite resources, we can’t grow indefinitely. Even the seemingly infinite stock of fish in the sea will dwindle and disappear if we keep fishing more and more – as we’ve seen with the collapse of the cod fishery in Newfoundland. In the past 30 years alone, we have consumed one third of the planet’s resources. Besides that, this production and consumption is polluting our air, water and land. So, given these environmental constraints, growth does not appear to be a feasible solution to the problem of unemployment.

So, what is?

Well, a few months ago, I read a book by Juliet Schor, which suggests an interesting alternative. The book I read was called True Wealth. It was previously published as Plenitude.

Dr. Schor, who is a professor of sociology at Boston College, proposes that we can reduce unemployment and protect the environment by working less. Yes, that’s right, we should each work less. Instead of working 40 hours a week, what if we worked at 80% of full time? That’s 32 hours a week -- 4 days a week instead of 5. Effectively, this would enable us to share the existing workload amongst more people.

You’re probably thinking right now about all the reasons this pie-in-the-sky socialist idea wouldn’t work, right? Well, in the early 1980’s, there was a worldwide economic downturn and Western Europe was particularly hard hit. The Netherlands decided to take a proactive stance and started hiring new government employees at an 80% work week. The idea caught on and public sector workers were joined by academics. Eventually, even their whole banking industry joined in the 80% schedule.

But what would people do with 20% less income. Well, for one, they would buy less. Immediately, that would reduce the strain on scarce environmental resources. Instead of shopping or buying new gadgets for our entertainment, we could spend time outside, read a book or hang out with friends. Instead of paying other people to make our food or coffee, we would do it ourselves – and thereby not only save money, but save on the packaging and disposable cups or napkins or cutlery that comes with having take-out.

But where are you going to find the time? Remember, the basis of this whole model is working less. Less time for work means more time for everything else. More time to do stuff can help offset the less money you have to buy stuff. So we’re buying less and creating more.

Of course, there are some things we can’t do on our own. Sometimes we’ll need help from other people. That’s also part of the model. With less time working, we could have more time connecting with other people. It could be friends helping friends move instead of hiring movers. It could be neighbours sharing a lawnmower rather each buying their own. We would be strengthening our social fabric while reducing unemployment and protecting the environment.

In summary, this model proposes that we work less, buy less, create more and connect more.

Albert Einstein once said that “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” This model of Plenitude, by Juliet Schor, is a different kind of thinking.

Positive social side effects

I'm a joiner.  I've always liked to join clubs and groups and organizations.  I like the group thing.  I like the team thing.  I like being part of a project.  I like going out and doing things.  And with a group of like-minded individuals, you can do just about anything.

One of the best things about these group activities is the positive social side effect.  We may meet for the purpose of giving food to the homeless, hosting a community lunch, organizing activities for children or improving our public speaking, but that's not all we get out of our meetings.  We get to talk to each other, listen to each other, learn from each other. 

From these seeds, I have seen friendships sprout and grow well beyond the setting in which they were planted.  That's the part I love.

Counting -- and missing what counts

Albert Einstein once said "Everything that can be counted does not necessarily count; everything that counts cannot necessarily be counted."

I find that's particularly true for community work.

Funders are always looking for numbers -- number of meetings, number of attendees, number of volunteer hours, number of partner agencies, number of actions, etc.  But these numbers may have little correlation to the amount of benefit that comes out of a community project.  How do you measure inspiration or a sense of belonging?  How do you measure increased confidence or trust or strengthened relationships?  Is an hour spent listening to the troubles of one youth less valuable than an hour spent running a workshop attended by 10?

A project may look great in the numbers and yet have little real impact with people on the ground.  With the right incentives (e.g. food, bus tokens, honoraria), people will attend meetings or fill out surveys or do actions on a checklist.  There are ways to get good numbers.  But in this quest for numbers and focus on counting, we risk losing the immeasurable things that really count.

We don't have to, though.  I believe it is possible to get both good numbers and real impact.  But our focus must stay on the people.

Sincerity speaks through our actions.  If we're looking for good numbers, people can feel it.  If we're looking to make a difference, people can feel it too.   We must only be sincere in our intents and let the numbers fall where they may.

Questioning business as usual

It isn't news to anyone that there's something wrong with our economy.  And I'm not just talking about the crash or the bailouts either.

In my high school economics class we learned that the goal of an economic system is to efficiently use and equitably distribute resources in a society.  Somewhere, it seems like we've veered off course.

Is it an efficient use of resources to cut down trees, burn fossil fuels, pollute our land, air and water to make cups, cartons and cameras that will only be used once and then thrown into landfills?  Is it equitable that executives receive million dollar bonuses as they lay off hundreds of workers?  Does it make sense that in a time and place of so much natural, material and technological wealth, food banks are serving record numbers of people?

It seems like business as usual isn't working for us anymore.

In her book, True Wealth (previously published as Plenitude), Juliet Schor suggests an alternative.  In a nutshell, she suggests that we work less, buy less, create more and connect more.  If people could work fewer hours, we could reduce unemployment by sharing the work amongst more people.  The lower income associated with shorter hours could also restrict consumption, thereby saving natural resources.  Fewer hours at work also means more hours of leisure, which people could use to create more on their own (through cooking, sewing, DIY projects, etc.).  Finally, more free time means more time to connect with other people and build community.

Sounds like a pretty good idea to me.

I need you to need me

I need you to need me
So I can know
I have a place in your life
A space in your life
Reserved
For me

The gift economy

There's a gift economy and a market economy.

In the gift economy, goods and services are given without condition of reciprocation.  This is what you see in families and friendships.  Parents do not expect payment for the food they serve their children at the dinner table.  Friends don't charge a fee for advice or company.  Goods and services are given and given and given.  They may be returned or they may not.

On a balance sheet of tangibles there may not be a profit.  But on both sides of the transaction, invaluable intangibles grow with compound interest.

Even a smile is charity

Our Girl Guide and Brownie unit was selling cookies today in front of the Metro at Liberty Village.  We had our cartons of cookies stacked in a little display near the store's entrance.  The girls were carrying a box in each hand (later reduced to only one box carried with both hands because too many boxes were getting dropped), eager to display their wares and sell them to interested customers.  Each time anyone came approached the door, the girls would ask, in the sweetest way they could, and often in unison, "Would you like to buy some Girl Guide cookies?"

Lots of people did.  In fact, we completely ran out of cookies about 10 minutes before the girls were getting picked up by their parents.  It was great.

But of course, not everyone bought cookies.  Lots of people walked right past us.  Some were busy talking on their phones.  Some completely ignored us.

And some would say "No, thank you." or "Sorry, I've already bought a bunch of cookies from my (friend/niece/grand daughter/etc.)" or "No, thanks, but good luck on the campaign!" and they would smile.

We appreciated that.

It also made a difference.

Feeding hungry hearts

When we started Project Downtown, we learned that it's not just about feeding hungry stomachs, but also hungry hearts.  So, when we go out and deliver our food packages, we try to stop and talk to the people we meet, ask them how they're doing and listen to them.  It's our small attempt to alleviate hunger in the heart as well as the stomach.

Today, I was reminded again of how the benefits of giving don't fall solely upon the recipient.

As we were walking back to the car after delivering our packages, we passed a group of the guys opening their packages and eating the sandwiches we made.  They smiled and thanked us and wished us a good evening and a good weekend.  We wished them the same.  My heart swelled.

After Project Downtown, a few of us had dinner together and spent the rest of the evening chatting and hanging out.  I love to spend an evening spent chatting and hanging out with friends.  It just fills me up.  And because we do Project Downtown every week, we get to hang out every week as well.  And I realized that Project Downtown also feeds my own hungry heart.

Useful - not used

A good leader makes people feel useful, without making them feel used.

Asking for help

It's hard to ask for help.

When I was writing my thesis, I struggled alone for months -- maybe even a year or more -- afraid to ask for help.  I didn't think anyone could help me.  I didn't want to burden anyone with my problems.  I was afraid of what people would think of me if I came to them with such a terrible piece of work.  I was afraid they would think I was incompetent. 

Fortunately, with help from friends and family (who came to help me before I was able to ask), I learned to ask for help.  This was one of the biggest lessons I took from graduate school.   It was instrumental to me finally being able to finish and graduate.

Now, while I'm taking time off and I'm not working or studying, I get to see asking for help from another perspective.

Without work or school, it's easy to feel lost, to feel out of place, to not have a place to belong.  I think the main reason I've been spared much of that is that people ask me for help.

It's little things, like picking up groceries, editing an essay, helping my neighbour bake muffins, or taking my friend's child to the doctor.  It takes just a few minutes here, maybe a couple of hours there.  None of the tasks are difficult or extraordinary, but the pleasure and satisfaction I get from first being asked and then being able to do something are tremendous.   I'm honoured.  I feel like I belong somewhere.  I feel like I matter and that I make a difference -- however small it may be.

It's like those puzzle pieces.  When we struggle alone, we're like separate pieces lying scattered on the table.  When we ask and give help, we're putting pieces together.  We're giving each other a place to fit.

Three hearts

Every Friday afternoon, my friends and I do Project Downtown.  We put together packages of food and snacks - lately it's been a hot dog or hamburger, a granola bar or two, a cheese bun and/or a muffin, an orange, a banana and juice - and distribute them to people hanging around City Hall who look like they would appreciate the food. 

We learned about Project Downtown four years ago, when a student from the US came to Toronto and introduced it to us.  One of the things he told us has really stuck with me.

Recently, I realized that it's something that applies to any good work or act of kindness done to benefit another person.

He said that when we go out and do Project Downtown, our actions touch three hearts.  One, we touch the heart of the recipient.  Two, we touch the heart of the person who sees us do what we do.  And three, we touch our own hearts.

How are you? Really?

How often do you say 'How are you?' out of habit?  How many times has someone asked you the question without waiting for the answer?  How do you answer when you're not actually fine or good or great or okay?

Can we ask the question differently?  Should we ask How are you feeling? How are you, really? How are you on a scale of one to ten?

It's an important question.  We need to ask it.  We need to answer it.  We need to hear the answer.  We need to have our answer heard.

Puzzle pieces

I love jigsaw puzzles. While helping my neighbour with her jigsaw puzzle one evening, I started thinking that puzzle pieces are a lot like people. They're all different. They have different shapes and different colours. On their own, they even look a bit quirky and odd. But each one of the protrusions that awkwardly jut out from one puzzle piece will fill a cavity in another piece. When we start bringing pieces together, we start finding places where every piece fits. And when every piece has been placed where it fits, we have a beautiful picture.